song of a song II and learning love

love is a ship
that will only sail
on the winds
of trust.

it is a treasure
that is only truly enjoyed
when it is found
after a long period
of searching.

it is a gift
that is only really appreciated
when you have waited
for it long enough.

it cannot be coerced
or manipulated.
it is by its very nature
free and wild.

it is soft as a kiss
yet as strong as death.
it turns the coward into a hero
and the poor into the wealthy.

There is nothing in this life
that is more precious and beautiful than love.

- - - - - - - - - -- - -

love is such a powerful and mysterious thing.
it is really only described . . . not defined. You cannot really
just explain it and be done with it. Or put it in a box of human logic.
It is bigger than that

paul knew this. and attempted to describe it:

"love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
it is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."

the only definition we have comes from John.

He wrote that God is love.
which makes sense in a weird way.
John is defining love by someone who is undefinable.
He is also saying all that we know about love, originally
came from God. If it were not for God, love would not exist.
He is the source of Love....The concept of it originated from His mind.
He displays it to perfection in His ways.
By His very nature....He is Love.

I would think that people who do not know God
are closest to stumbling across Him when they are in
love with someone. there is nothing else in this world
that so marvelously makes us forget ourselves like love.
there is nothing else in this world that breaks us from our
selfishness and makes us vulnerable like love.

it is when we love that we are closest to the heart of God.

humanity has known
no greater feeling or truth
than the reality of love.

true love is something that can only be learned.
and we learn real love in the hardest ways.

I hope God is teaching you each and every day more about what it is to truly love.
If we are to learn true and real love, we have to go to Him and let Him teach us.

After all, it was His idea in the first place.

real revolution

"everybody wants a revolution, but no one wants to do the dishes"

there are men and women all across this barren land that are shouting about something.
they stand on rooftops and stages. they preach from pulpits of hidden motives.
they write books and blogs (guilty as charged).

they shout about issues, beliefs, and controversies.
some even dare to promise revolution; to make a difference.
they shout, scream, and holler. but they expect others to do the real work of change.

they want revolution. but they don't want to do the dishes.

they have idealism without realism;
vision without practicality.
courage without love;
promises without action.

but there are some people, a rare and precious few, who shout with their lives.

these people don't remain aloof from the things they preach about. no, that which
they preach is "even more fully in their heart". intimately acquainted with needs,
they are the kings who disguise themselves and become beggars in order to live among their own people.

it's the people who believe in something and allow it to permeate their lives.
there is no disconnection or incongruity between what they believe and how they live.
for them, Truth and action are not to be divorced . . . they are to be lovers that belong with each other.

these people proclaim revolution. and they do the dishes.

indeed, these are the real revolutionaries.
and when the world is confronted with people like this....change ensues.

its when martin luther king jr. preached nonviolence, then after having his home bombed by white-racists, he told the angry mob of blacks around his house (who wanted to fight back) to meet hate with love and go home.
its when mother theresa spoke against abortion at the White House then reached out her hands asking mothers to not abort the child, but to give the babies to her instead.
its when jesus preached love for enemies, then got on his knees and washed his betrayers feet.
these are a unique breed of people; "the world is not worthy of them".

a people whose throats are strained from proclaiming truth;
and whose knees are bruised from kneeling with the broken.
a people who cry out for justice in public;
and silently sit with the downtrodden in private.

a people of revolution. and a people who do the dishes.

to those of you who have ears to hear, hear this:

all that is needed to bridge
the gaping chasm between
faith and deeds,
is one person; one real revolutionary.

ontological mess

for every human person, every need has a corresponding answer.

You hunger? there is such a thing as food.
You thirst? there is such a thing as water.
You desire community? there is such a thing as friendship.
You desire intimacy? there is such a thing as love.
You want to express yourself? there are such things as art, writing, dance, etc.

for all needs you may have, there is somehow an answer; a matching fulfillment.

So here is where I say that there is a need for the transcendent, namely, God.
And a corresponding answer to the need is of course, God.
But not so fast you say.

I don't need God and I definitely don't desire Him.

I can respect that.
but why does such a thing (the need for God) exist in the first place?
Why do some humans (not you of course) experience a need for something divine in the first place?

Why oh why, would the human being have a need for something that does not exist?
How is it possible to desire something in the first place, if that thing does not exist?

You had to be told about the concept of a fairy before you desired its existence.
You had to be told about the concept of a unicorn before you desired existence.

but, some people have a raw impulse for God. they were born with an innate desire for God.... without having been previously told that He existed.

a raw, natural, intuitive desire for the transcendent. without ever having been told of the concept of the transcendent.

ancient civilizations believed in the divine without ever having to first be told about the existence of the divine.
humanity was born with an innate desire for something more than this world has to offer.
without ever being told about God in the first place.

what does that mean?

it means that maybe you should think about why it is that you have a need for something more than what you can see in front of you.
it means that maybe there is something more and you should at least investigate.

after all, the unexamined life is not worth living.

on hell

there are many different views on the subject of hell.
A plethora of theologians argue and debate constantly over this subject. Will people be punished forever? Or will they be punished for an alloted time, then annihilated? Other questions rise to the surface as well: How does a loving God live with Himself while people are suffering eternally? Surely, after some time, he would restore these people or grant them the favor of abolishing their souls forever. Isn't the concept of hell completely incongruent with a loving God anyway? What is hell like for the damned? What sort of punishment is being administered to its inhabitants? Is it a emotional/mental retribution? Does it involved excruciating physical pain? Or is it all three? Are the degrees of punishment contingent upon the degree of evil in the person being punished? Is it a "lake of fire"? Is there a dude with horns and a pitch-fork laughing the whole time?

The greek word used for hell is "gehenna" in the New Testament. "Gehenna" is the Christian rendering of "Ge Hinnon", literally "Valley of Hinnom". In the Old Testament, the word used is "Gai Ben-Hinnom", which refers to a real valley in Jerusalem. This valley is located outside the city, and it is basically a garbage dump where waste is burned. Stemming from this idea, many think that hell well be a place outside the city of God, where the filth of humanity dwells. This presents problems too: How could God and His people (his holy, loving people) be rejoicing while others (including loved ones) are being tortured outside?

as you can see, there is a lot of questions pertaining to the subject of hell.
I won't attempt to answer what only God can fully answer.
But here is what I think are the underlying foundations of hell:

1. Hell is a place of isolation.

One could even use this metaphorically and say: "Hell is the absence of God; God-isolation". The earth as we know it is not devoid of the presence of God. The natural processes that God instilled are still running. God is still working/sustaining life despite spiritual opposition from unknown forces and internal opposition in the hearts of mankind. Even though at certain times in history, we have seen glimpses of it (i.e. the Holocaust), the world has not experienced the complete abandonment of God's presence. For God to completely turn his back on the world is something so horrible, so horrifying that it is reserved only for the enemies of God in the afterlife. (Ironically, we see in the Gospels how Christ experienced the complete abandonment of God when he was dying on the cross. He cried out, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" Indeed, Jesus was punished as an enemy of God. In the crucifixion, Jesus of Nazareth becomes the first living person in history to fully experience Hell). Humanity as we know it, could not withstand the magnitude of that catastrophe. Could you imagine what it would be like for the Creator of life to abandon the creation that is sustained by His very breath? Nothing in this world is more unnatural and appalling than that.

2. On this earth we have experienced/caught glimpses of hell itself.

Some people are so isolated and alone that they are already experiencing a pinch of hell in this life. Perhaps that is why Mother Theresa said, "The most terrible poverty is loneliness and the feeling of being unloved". We see hell reflected in the darkest of evils on earth as well: genocide, rape, abortion (controversy alert!), suicide bombings, etc. We see hell in dead babies and starving, pot-bellied children. We see hell in tsunamis that kill thousands upon thousands. We see hell in victims of sexual abuse. We see hell when we look deeply into the eyes of a sex-trafficked girl.
Some people, are so caught up in their personal hate, their life of sin, that they have ceased to become evil . . . they are evil; an "object of wrath" . . . they are the people whose natures have become utterly evil. These people are so consumed that there is no turning back for them, mainly because they have lost all notions of goodness. To love would be unnatural for them, conflicting with their nature.

3. God did not create hell.

we did. from the first moment an opportunity arose, humanity as a collective whole has been sinning. We are naturally inclined to resist God's will, thereby imposing our own. Perhaps that is all hell is. A place where those who reject God's way finally get their way. A place where the loving God sorrowfully gives people what they really want.

And to our everlasting shame, it is a place that must exist because in the end, we have chosen not God. And the only alternative to not having God is a existence of isolation. If God is the creator of reality, than those who chose other than Him have chosen nothingness . . . a void of nonexistence.

to whomever it may concern

You woke up today and without even thinking for a millisecond,
You took a breath. Raising your head off your stained blue pillow,
You fill your empty, lifeless lungs with sustaining existence once again.
Looking out the window, the first rays of dawn are seeping into your bedroom and
you don't give a damn. just another day.
You sigh and realize with every unthinking breath, you choose to constantly live.

It's an involuntary necessity of life.

Walking into the office, you cast a tight-lipped glance at someone that annoys you. That someone
notices of course. They ponder for 1 minute and 35 seconds about why you might hate them. Maybe
the look you gave was just . . . bad timing? Walking down the corridor to the lunch room, you see
an attractive coworker making copies. As if in protest, the thought of your spouse comes to your mind.

You fantasize anyway.

Its 4:30 pm and work is almost over. You decide to check out a little early and begin the brief walk home.
The air hits your skin and in response you look up. The sky is ironically beautiful in light of your mundane day. It looks like a half-done canvas waiting to become a finished portrait; a mass of blue sky, pink ambience, and hazy gold radiating off the fading sun. Thoughts of why you continue in this meaningless routine echo in your mind. This job is duty without pleasure . . . work without joy. Your head hangs low as you continue to walk. You keep your eyes fixated on the jagged cracks in the sidewalk. Memories of your life flood into your mind and play like an old-fashioned movie; black and white images of the past that won't stop moving.

You wonder what it is that has kept you going all these years.

You open the door to your tiny, one-bedroom apartment. The smell of chinese food mixed with Fabreeze overpowers
your nostrils. The apartment is empty, devoid of any intelligent life except yours. Everything is silent and still. . . everything, that is, except for you. You internally rage at whatever or whomever contrived your pathetic existence; if God created this, what the hell was he thinking? You would scream, but who do you scream at? You would curse at someone or something, but who is there to blame? All thoughts of God aside, you've chosen your own path and this is where it has led: a dying marriage, shallow friendships, and a job that makes you want to jump in front of an on-coming semi. Your face is hot from the building tears in your eyes.

You let them fall.

And it is at precisely at this moment that you turn against yourself. Every vile thought of contempt that you direct at others, every exasperating feeling that you've buried, and every despairing emotion that has stayed on the edge of your consciousness now crashes into your mind all at once. It erupts like a massive volcano that threatens to overwhelm you; a charging stampede that tramples you, leaving you in a heap of guilt and shame. This is becoming a daily routine.

A soft knock at the door interrupts your thoughts.

You hastily wipe your face and go to the door. As you swing the door open, you find yourself looking into the pale face of a young man about the age of 20. He has a name tag and tie on. He begins a rehearsed greeting and already, you aren't even listening. Before long, he starts to sound like the teacher off of Charlie Brown: "WaWaWaWa". You're trying to figure out what religion he is as you slam the door in his face.
You look over at the coffee table. Your eyes scan across the laminated cover of the book lying on top of it. A christian who works with you gave it to you to read. "The Shack", it's called. You started to read it and it had you at first. But when you got to the part where God was represented as an old black woman, you couldn't stop laughing. It was the most ridiculous thing ever. Sometimes religious people are so cheesy. You wonder (in some impossible way) if they are all related to Mr. Rogers. You wonder if they are aware that they are completely irrelevant to humanity. And if they are aware, do they even care enough to change? You just don't see the point.

You need something real. something you can relate to.
something that doesn't answer everything with gimmicks
and formulas, but makes sense of it all.
something that makes you feel alive.
something that doesnt solve all your problems
but helps you cope with them. something that
would for once give you some peace. something
that doesn't make you hate yourself but saves
you from yourself. something that doesn't just focus
on life after death, but life before death.

or is it even something?
maybe it's someone.
or maybe you're just all alone.

a choice of nature

you've tethered insecurities to your soul
with tightly woven chords of indignity.

you've sowed seeds of worth
into worthless things that will fade like grass.

and with every
small choice,
with every
insignificant decision,
the shifting and swirling sand
of your nature,
is hardening
into unmovable granite.

you're sailing on a heavy-laden ship that bears
you on a severe current of deception.

you've accepted the invitation to a feast of lies,
where everyone fights to be the guest of honor.

and with every
small choice,
with every
insignificant decision,
the spiraling and seething shadows
of your being
are becoming darker.

you're living in fake house of false hope,
and all the while there are wolves at the door.

you've prostituted yourself to cheap pleasures;
idols that never cease to leave you empty.

and with every
small choice,
with every
insignificant decision,
the twisting and spinning fabrics
of your soul
are becoming
a garment that
you will wear
for all eternity.

the light

a golden silhouette pervades
and highlights all of existence.
a light so bright that it interrupts the dawn.

a gleaming halo of splendor and radiance;
seeking its way across the fields of time.
its warm essence enraptures the soul;
a light that gives meaning in destitute darkness.

"how long will this starless night last?",
cried the children.
"how long will shadow overtake us?",
the widows lamented.
"how long will the the hearts of men hide?",
the poor shouted.

for the wintry loneliness,
that seizes the heart
with its frigid and icy hands,
has taken hold of us all.

our eyes are dead with darkness;
but surely the light will come.

to a multitude,
a tiny candle in the unlikely distance;
a luster that somehow catches the eye.

to several,
a flashlight bursting forth amidst trees in the bleak woods;
a hazy glow in the quiet recesses of the mind.

and to some, to a rare few:
a blazing firelight that rages on in furious passion,
a burning star of hope that fights to shine.

surely the light will come.
surely dear child,
the light is here.


"You, O Lord, keep my lamp burning;
my God turns my darkness into light." -Psalm 18:28